(Pause the music until the slide show if you don't want to listen while you read)
Call me crazy but I have to mentally prep for this day! (Large quantities of Diet coke, several boxes of Kleenex, mounds and hordes of antibacterial hand sanitizer...oh the germs, don't get me started. And some sort of yummy fattening treat to indulge myself with) I know I am strange! Many mothers are overjoyed with the fact that they have freedom from their children. And although I enjoy time to myself too, I am also one of those mom's who dread school. The what if's in my mind are endless. What if their teacher doesn't like them? What if they hate school? What if they gets embarrassed? What if she can't unbuckle her pants before she makes it to the bathroom? (Ha...don't laugh ..... that happened to me in first grade....and it is a memory I try to suppress)
I mean come on people, can't they just make a magic pill for mothers like me that make us float around on "cloud nine" instead of going into sheer panic mode! Don't get me wrong, once I fall into the routine of things and know that my daughter is happy and loving school....I can enjoy it too! But until then, watch out!
I am sure many feel nostalgic walking back into a classroom. But looking at those kids faces with their awkward expressions of scared, happy, excited, and nervous emotions mixed together, made my face start twitching and I could slowly feel that same paralyzed look wash over me!(breath breath breath breath breath.....is what I had to repeat to myself several times)
I was doing good all things considered. My tear ducks seemed to be dry ...which was an added bonus, so I wouldn't embarrass my poor daughter.
I probably hovered a little longer than I should have. I probably scared children with that frightened look on my face. I probably laughed to hard at something a parent said that probably wasn't even funny.
With one last glance and a few more over explanatory comments to the teacher....I strolled away. There. I could feel my face soften slightly as I walked down the hall to the outside doors. I made it. No tears. No hyperventilating. I think I even smiled as I started down the sidewalk, Caleb at my side, and Kennedy in the stroller. I did it! I wanted to shout for joy!
It only took that ONE second to pull me back to reality and quickly feel my face paralyze back up when Caleb said "Mommy, I can't wait to start kindergarten next week!"
Tears ducks...not so dry!!!
(here are a few picture of Savanah's first day of First Grade, along with her Kindergarten and some age 4 pictures...man has she grown. I loved this song from Mama Mia/once by Abba.....I hated the show but fell in love with this song! I know it is only First Grade but I do feel my little girl slipping though my fingers and growing up! )
3 days ago